Have yourself a realistic little Christmas
I’ve been Googling ‘pastors’ and ‘Christmas’ and have come across a bunch of blogs. Their titles alone make for some fun reading.
There are a couple of why Christmas is tough on pastors and several Christmas pastoral survival guides. This one suggests that Christmas reveals what we truly value. This guy doesn’t pull any punches I hate Christmas: A pastor’s confession. And then there was this delightfully titled exhortation, Pastor, don’t get cute this Christmas.
If you’re a minister yourself, or if you’re close to one, you’ll likely not be surprised by the blogs’ suggestions and tone. I think it’s fair to say that ministers have mixed feelings about Christmas.
Whereas for their congregations, Christmas is generally a lovely time of remembering the Christ child in amongst the busyness of the holiday season, pastors carry the can- ensuring that young and old, regulars, visitors, and once-a-year Christians have an opportunity to gaze into the manger with awe and wonder- and then collapse on Boxing Day.
It seems to me that ministers can have expectations that are either too high or too low about what Christmas events can achieve.
Here is a list of hopes that pastors might conceivably expect of their Christmas activities:
That regulars might invite friends to Christmas activities
That congregants might be reminded of the profound meaning of the incarnation
That kids and young people will feel involved and included
That unchurched folk will attend, be welcomed, and find the activities and/or services meaningful
That unchurched folk might hear about the range of activities and forms of community the church offers
That people who are already connected to the wider church community (like Mainly Musics or elder care programs) might make their way to a Christmas service.
Several of my clients have confessed to feeling underwhelmed by the degree to which their church’s Christmas activities deliver. Or to rephrase the point, that the outcomes (in terms of discipleship and local mission) don’t justify the input (in terms of energy, stress, and staff and volunteers hours).
I have discovered, when coaching ministers, that a little bit of Pathways thinking can be enormously helpful in clarifying who their Christmas activities are for, and what each activity is aiming to achieve.
For those unfamiliar with Pathway terminology, here’s a very brief synopsis and then three little maxims.
Potential Contacts are people whom your church is yet to connect with
Once contact is made, people are In Touch, meaning an acquaintanceship has begun with someone from the church community. Once this has occurred, they are only an invitation away from
Belonging, meaning that they have begun attending regularly a group that includes a number of Christians. Groups like this are often designed to meet a felt need, like coffee groups, Minly Musics, or ESOL programs.
People who feel a sense of belonging and have made a number of Christian friendships are only an invitation away from beginning the journey of seriously considering the claims of Christ. If people reach the Embracing the Gospel stage, they come to believe that they can be restored to their intended relationship with God through repentance and faith.
People who have embraced the gospel can then be invited to join an environment that helps them shape their lives around the teachings and values of Jesus. This is the Following Jesus stage.
The next stage is Serving in Ministry where Jesus-followers are invited to help support and contribute to the life of the church.
The final stage is Leading Ministry, where believers use their God-given talents to serve in leadership capacities.
Maxim 1: The Pathways stages become helpful when we realise that activities or programs can really only serve one stage well. For example, a small group designed to help young believers learn about Following Jesus 101 will lose its way if it also attempts to become a Belonging space for those who have not yet decided to follow Christ. Or a Mainly Music will have a revolt on its hands if it attempts to help young Mums Embrace the Gospel the week they first arrive.
So do the discernment work to figure out which stage each activity is attempting to serve.
Maxim 2: Knowing what an activity or service’s aim is, helps us clearly articulate the outcome that, God willing, we will see. For example, if you decide that your small groups need to stay in the Following Jesus lane, you’ll be able to communicate this more clearly to your small group leaders, and you’ll be watching to see if that is in fact what is occurring.
Maxim 3: As well as knowing the function of a given ministry or program, leaders need to know what kind of invitation to offer those who have successfully negotiated the current activity. We want people to continue moving forward on their discipleship journey, but if we don’t invite them to do so, it’s unlikely that they will. For instance, the invitation to someone who has Embraced the Gospel on an Alpha course could be to a mentoring relationship or a small group. Or the invitation to a mum who is a regular at Mainly Music (In Touch) is to invite her to Thursday’s coffee group (Belonging).
So, here’s where Pathways can be helpful in planning your Christmas events.
Firstly, if you can accurately place a given event in a Pathway category, that means you can also name the outcome that you hope will occur. If you can name the hoped-for outcome (to yourself and others), you should be able to pretty easily shrug off any expectations that other people might have of things that did not occur.
Secondly, if you know the outcome you hope will occur, you can offer relevant invitations to the next step.
Let me give you some examples:
If you place the Christmas fete in the In Touch category, the function of the endeavor becomes developing acquaintanceship-level connections. That’s the ultimate target. So get your church extroverts out amongst the crowd introducing themselves. Then the invitation (perhaps advertised on your flyers) is the range of church activities you offer. God-willing some of the people you’ve come in contact with will be looking for the type of Belonging space that you offer.
If you place your Christmas Day service in the Following Jesus category, the focus narrows to become one of simple discipleship. The person you have in mind as you prepare your sermon is a young Christian distracted by the baubles and fluff of the holiday season. Because she is your focus, you worry less about the expectations of visiting holidaymakers and the committed and regular Saints; if for some reason their Christmas service expectations weren’t fulfilled, that’s ok. They weren’t the target. And the perfect invitation to this young Christian might be an offer to join one of your weekly bible study groups.
If in previous years, you too have felt underwhelmed by the outcomes of your church’s Christmas activities, give this a try. For each event ask yourself:
Who’s it for?
What outcome do I hope will occur?
What kind of invitation should I offer to people who might be ready to take the next step?